1921

因为重视，所以小心，所以写不出稿！！！！

this is the first time i've seriously contemplated the idea of giving up on my dreamsand despite all the difficulties and pains of the environment that i have no power of changing the greatest pushing factor would be how inadequate and incapable i am even after two years. i'm so so thankful for the colleague who teaches me so much even though she's not obliged to and despite heeding everyone's advice to watch more programs i've only come to realize that i've not been watching what i should be looking out for as an audience, i look out for how entertaining, touching and thought-provoking a program is as a newbie writer, i look out for how interesting/different the story plot is and whether the characters are still in-character but as a staff writer, what i should be looking out for are the small events that push the story forward and portray characters' personality in subtle manners. and yet, i've only realized it now, after nearly 1 year and 10 ...

Back from an overseas trip w Joycelyn 😊 Despite the vastly different hygiene habits lol, I like how we can be so similar in many many ways  Long time since I've left the comfort of home  But china does seem to become the home of a close friend such that I'm at so much ease whenever I'm there  The lack of language barrier and even becoming similar in the accents probably helped a great deal  And opening your heart many little bits more definitely helps too  Even though our feets and legs are in so much pain for the past 5-6 days    It was a great getaway and a very appropriate time for me to clear some thoughts  While I have so much doubts on my future and desire to leave the place I once aspired to be in  I do know that it gives me a great deal of freedom and happiness when I do get to do something I like  Only that, how many years of youth can I spend?  And eve...

What others didn't tell you about pursuing your dreams Is that you may not be good enough after all.  Have been entertaining this thought for a while now  Much as this is what I love most  Maybe I don't actually love it as much as what others do  Maybe that's why such thoughts recur time and again  Maybe it's the environment  Maybe it's the nature of how things work here  Maybe it's the lack of quick thinking brains Maybe  I've just been standing at the wrong door Waiting for the wrong opportunities all this while  In any case, thankful for today's upupupz Still bad, but finally a more decent level to leverage myself against when I try moving out