I don't know what got into me but this whole morn was shitty:( Kind of got myself crazy perhaps after yesterday or perhaps other issues like being unable to find my stuff etc I got so upset, irritated and angry when I keep writing n instead of k for MI and the loss of my correction liquid made ne so irritated by the strike out lines I had on my tutorial book, I went crazy in front of my dad and kind if shrieked at him after he passed me a correction liquid that ran out of liquid And that triggered all the tears of frustration anger and all kinds of mixed emotions Nothing including screaming beats just letting your weakness poor out for that short 5 mins But that made my dad upset I guess He didn't see me tearing but I'm sure the shriek I let out after he passed me the stationary hurt him more that what it did to me It was his efforts for finding after all And he didn't talk to me since then Feeling bad and all to him but I would also like to thank him for scolding me ba...
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No more time to lose.
Inspirations keep flowing to me and emotions and thought are just triggered by any event But no, it's not the time for creative writing, but essay writing. Talked to zhengls abt university and career for awhile after lesson today and her words made me wonder if such passion is gonna last if I'm using it for work stress and bread... Idk but tmr's gonna be hell I think The cll teachers seem ready to shoot me down tmr:( And i don't like disappointing mr loh with undone tutorials:( Lol the post has lost its direction haha But yup I deactivated fb once again cause toooooooo much time there:/ Followed Melpomene's footsteps haha Kay doing gp then maths later:) Please please please stop the procrastination and slacky attitude :/ Was the last guitar activity ytd though I just went for like half an hour And in all, I want to say that I'll miss being in the same cca with Esther hong You're such a great kiddo friend me love estherrrrr:D haha And this morn's econs ...
我不哭 不代表我不痛 我不哭，不代表我不痛。我不吵，不代表我不疼。 激情过后、 誓言破碎承诺只是一张白纸、我真的不知道你为什么忍心伤害我、我以为真的会像你说的、爱我一辈子、陪我一辈子、你说过的你不会放开我的手、你带我见了你爸妈、 我以为真的你就是我一辈子的人、你喂我吃饭、喂我喝水、给我磕瓜子、你知道我那时心里有多甜么、我喜欢和你打打闹闹、喜欢你抱我、那一天你吻了我、那一夜我们在了一起你抱着我、说爱我、真的好幸福、喜欢你关心我。 可我没想到就这样就这样、你还是勾搭上了别的女人、那时我怀孕了、你尽然说我激动什么就是忽悠个女女玩、你还骂我、我问你我算什么、你说算媳妇、我说了一句你滚吧、过了俩天你又换了一个女人、你对我说就是对她们玩玩而已、我真的彻底失望、我怪自己瞎了眼、那天晚上我对你说怀孕了你解决、如果不怀孕咱俩从此就是陌生人、你说何必这样呢。你说有孩子就打掉吧、我笑了、真可笑、你说你其实爱我、我对你说老公你真幽默抱着别人说爱我、 那天晚上我想了好多、我承认我爱你、真的爱上你了、我想狠心的给你一巴掌我想骂你、可是我骂不出口、第二天。我对你说孩子的事不用你管了、我自己解决吧、希望你和她幸福、你对我说何必呢你已经够委屈了其实这话我心里甜甜的。我说不用了我祝福你。 过了一个星期、我去了医院、一个人去了医院当时心里真的好害怕、医生问我你真的想好了要打掉、这样会很伤身体 、我说恩、打吧！ 孩子打掉了脸色好白、医生说好好回家养养把否则以后落下病、出了医院我在也忍不住了、我哭了、这些日子第一次这样哭、这些日子我承受了太多、我捂着肚子、宝宝是被我自己亲手杀掉的，我在坚强我也只是一个女人、为何总总事情我都要自己面对自己扛、为何激情后你就要抛弃我、你为何这么狠心！ 宝宝没了回到家我不吃不喝。就那样坐着发呆、我什么也没有告诉他、那天以后他也从没问过我一句、 摘自百度贴吧－最感人的故事。 Not a kind of story that I would like to read cause it's kind of centered around relationships and nothing much to learn from other than...
the really last performance in guitar :) ... at parliament house ;) for PAP ministers! :D so so so gleeful to see the ministers! PM SM MM Mr George Yeo DPM etcetc :D thankful to guitar for this opportunity! :D funfun with alto ppl and all the jokes that's going on haha and yup miss having esther around though :( yup, and well, like harry potter, it all ends... nearly :) passing down soon i guess (i didn't even know that we haven't passed down haha) anw, TIME FOR WORK! ... after moonlight resonance :)
harry potter, always :)
finally reached the end of harry potter after watching deathly hallows part 2 this afternoon with ang muni and sam :) was so excited about it that i couldn't sit still, think straight, and can totally forget about concentrating even though it's like a day wasted but well, nothing is wasted for harry potter :) simply love every bit of the show :) not because it's perfect, but it's the last few bits that we have to save in the memory for harry potter :) even though the memory of reading the book is really vague, but the story was still stucked in my head since idk when i last read it :) may be exaggerating it, but harry potter really made my life more eventful and a yearly, or biannually hope for it's book or production :) sad that i joined in the craze late when order of phoenix was released, but these yearsssssss (10 to 18) had been such magical years due to the very harry potter :) to that, much much much thanks to jkrowling :) after watching the film, i was remind...
Super thankful for a mum that is so understanding and encouraging:) Much as this mistake was terribly stupid, but I have been true to myself and I did not make up any false "achievements":) Also, I feel kind of glad and appreciaive that 郑老师 approved it:) Even though she might approve everyone's to make it sound nice, But I feel as though she recognized my efforts, perhaps not but still, It made my efforts seem a little more acknowledged :) 不是真实的，尽管说得再好听，也都是空虚的字眼和自欺欺人的谎言 我沒有必要為了這所謂的功成名就，再次背著良心說話。
Keep trying :)
"I'm not perfect but I keep trying" :D - Hedley And you knw what? Correcting mistakes is really hard, But it's the process of learning :) And I find it pretty amusing that most of ms huda's gp consultation slot got filled up soon after she opened it By 6c11 mostly hahaha Keen learners :) Anw, CTs: Dropped from B to S for Econs, B to D for CLL C to D for History, A to B for Maths baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas buck up buck up! On the brighter side, U to D for GP Merit for H3 :) Continue working on it xiaowei!!!:D Kallang macs is superrrrrr cold D: But I like studying here :D
i realised, my blog seems to portray an image of a super hardworking and determined xiaowei, which is contrary to what i'm doing now, watching tv? haha nah, the super xiaowei will come back soon :) kind of disappointed in cll grades actually, but it's the process of learning to do better :) was pretty anxious about the grades before going to clep room, but not too sure what i was afraid of. then i realised, the anxiety halved after i got back paper 1 and h3 cause my compo was not that bad :) haha kind of happy about that actually :) even though h3 only attained 29/50, which is verrrrrry low but on account that i missed out a point in the question, 29 isn't that bad hehe and she commented that the way i wrote wasn't bad :) hahaha unsure if it's good, but i'm pretty glad it's not bad haha and ms k reminded us today, Did I dropped History to H1, just to get a PASS? Or was it for an A? kkay, goodnights, virtual world :)
my gp. passed. :) to my surprise actually :) hahaha but nothing beats the affirmation ms huda gave me at the canteen :) she saw how i kept trying, even though i kept doing badly. and she kept marking, kept correcting, kept trying her best to help her once U-graded student :) but like she said, great efforts, but i have to keep it up :) this 14 mark improvement is nothing if i don't commit another 14 mark improvement in the near near future. i choose to trust that miracles happen when i put in sufficient effort. even though it doesn't always happen, but i have to remember that without efforts, nothing will happen. it's 69 days to prelims and 122 days to the big A don't give up! no matter what comes tmr, accept it and learn to move on cause there's no time to waste jiayouuuuuu :D
harry potter and the deathly hallows premiere :)
Daniel Radcliffe, "The stories we loved best do live in us forever." J. K. Rowling, "So whether you come back by page or by the big screen, Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home." :) from to and she changed what 'books' meant to me through harry potter :)
On this day of your life, Xiaowei, we believe God wants you to know ... that God sees you as you truly are, - a holy child of light: I see you strong and whole. I see you blessed and prospered. I see you courageous and confident. I see you capable and successful. I see you free from all limitations or bondage of any kind. I see you as the spiritually perfect being you truly are. much as this seems to be an encouragement, but we can't allow ourselves to be who we are most of the times can we?
found it from xintian's tumblr :) who cares about the uproar over the lady gaga fun pack song? it's just for fun, to make the audience have fun and the atmosphere greater for the event. what fault is it just to appeal to audiences through pop culture? isn't everyone doing it? and it isn't even the official song .____. shut up about all the disgust and upset over it, listen, feel for it, and regain the pride one should have for being a singaporean :)
what's wrong with being alone? too wrong, too much fear, till we often become unable to survive being alone. so much thoughts in you makes one really desire to just be left alone for awhile to process the thoughts but we hardly ever get this time when we are in public. you have to consider this and that, and the people around no matter if they are strangers or friends. in that case, it becomes so incredibly hard to be yourself cause whatever you do, act or feel, impact others and you have to change the way you are acting on the spot, though unwillingly. im looking forward to a time, when i can leave wherever i was, to an area where no one is with me, and that will be a time when i am as near to being who i really want to be, regardless of others. can't i act just what i feel like?
